Thursday, 6 August 2015

After The End of Teletoon Retro

I think Teletoon has caught on to the fact that people would rather watch classic cartoons on Teletoon Retro than ANYTHING on the mothership network nowadays. So, instead of bitching, complaining, and bemoaning the fact that one of the only cable networks worth subscribing to will be shutting down at the end of the Summer, let's find the canary in the coal mine and see what good can come from this.

First and foremost, we can assume that Corus Entertainment will divvy up the shows on Retro and air them on their other kids networks.The bulk of their shows will most likely move to Teletoon; I know from watching one of the channel's ads that The Smurfs is heading there. That's great news to hear since the majority of Teletoon's lineup was reruns of original shows that didn't really age well (barring Jimmy Two-Shoes, which apparently has a cult following). The addition of classic cartoons will definitely draw in new viewers and leave a little room for their current lineup of shows to shine, though I highly doubt people are getting hyped up for another season of Dr. Dimensionpants.

Babar and the Berenstain Bears will probably return to Treehouse and Dexter's Lab and The Powerpuff Girls to Cartoon Network, despite the latter previously airing on Teletoon prior to the return of Camp Teletoon. But wouldn't it be nice if the latter two shows returned to YTV instead? That's another network in dire need of some decent shit because, like I said before, anything on Teletoon is better than what's on YTV. Anything.

I also believe broadcasting companies can benefit from operating fewer channels, since that will eliminate the need to recycle shows, reduce brand overlap, and save a few dimes. The majority of all cancon on Shaw Media's networks are all the same shit; MTV2 is more akin to a BET network than a MTV sibling, and Rogers would be a few bucks richer if they would just shut down G4, a channel that no one watches and has made little efforts to get noticed. So, I do believe shutting down Retro is for the best.

But don't be fooled, this not being done in the interest to "service" us, nor does it have anything to do with Corus' commitment "to [provide] high quality, award winning programming for Canadian kids and their families". This is a business decision, plain and simple, and they could give a shit less what you think. Cancon requirements will soon be lowered and genre-protection will become a thing of the past. The decision to close Teletoon Retro and incorporate its programming into its siblings will be a benefit to Corus' Kids division as long as they don't fuck it up.

However, the trade-off is that Canadian networks will soon become a lot more shittier.

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