Sunday, 26 April 2015

Reycralibur Reboot: Update April 2015

Reycralibur is cancelled...., sort of.

Yes, it's official, I'm done with Reycralibur. Why? Because it's just a pain writing and filming something that I have no interest in doing anymore. At the same time, I don't want to stop making SSB64 machinima or abandon this "world" I've created. So, what I'm gonna do instead is reboot Reycralibur as an entirely new series using all the retcons I've made. If you wish, you can see those in the episode one remake as well as episode twelve, which will be the last episode. At some point, I'll get around to releasing those two, but only for those who wanted to see what happens next (ie, no one).

After that, I'm going to redo the show in its entirety. Some of the characters from Reycralibur will return (*coughKay*cough), others won't. This new series, "Reycralibur 2.0", if you will, will be more comedic in-tone and less episodic. This is all part of my new change in direction, where I focus more on short-form comedic videos, parodies, gag dubs, and the occasional AMV. I'm only developing the reboot now, so check back here later for more updates.

In the meantime, I won't say I'll be releasing more videos at a more quicker pace, because I KNOW I'm not good at being true to my word, but I'll try. Lets just say, I've come up with a LOT of ideas for new videos in the last couple of months and leave it at that.

Tuesday, 21 April 2015

The Fate of Disney XD

Disney XD started off as a more juvenile version of Disney Channel. Save for shows like Arron Stone and Zeek & Luthor, as well as reruns of shows carried over from Toon Disney, Jetix, and ABC Kids, the rest of the channels output was much of the same garbage that aired on Disney Channel.

Over time though, particularly with the launch of Marvel Universe, the channel started to get better. Premiers of Disney Channel cartoons moved to Disney XD, Shows like Motorcity and Tron: Uprising turned some heads, and even their live-action output was becoming more watchable. It has gotten to the point where Disney XD has become, in most ways, better than Disney Channel.

But that's the American version, the Canadian version is every bit as bad as Disney XD was back in those days. That's why I'm glad that DHX Media is rebranding it as Family XTRM, it means one less crappy American-branded channel clogging up my dial. I just hope the new channel's output won't be as bad as it is now.

Thursday, 16 April 2015

RE: Corus gains Canadian rights to Disney Channel content
I just heard that DHX Media and Disney are calling it quits, which means the Family Channel will never have to air Disney Channel's tweenage crap again! However, Corus Entertainment now owns the rights to Disney Channel and Disney XD's programming and plan on launching, god help us all, a Canadian version of Disney Channel later this year!

The news is bittersweet for me because, as much as I like Girl Meets World, Disney cartoons, and virtually everything on Disney XD (except most the sitcoms, of course), the rest of Disney Channel's programming is so godawful and the Canadian version of Disney XD has become nothing but a rerun farm of that crap. It's very exiting that the channel that was originally licensed as "Family Extreme" will get a reboot and, hopefully, better shows.

On the other hand, it's bad enough that Corus already owns Nickelodeon, Cartoon Network, and their Canadian counterparts, but now they get to add Disney Channel to the mix. When CTV bought TSN, the CRTC forced them to sell Sportsnet because they couldn't own two major sports networks, just like they did when they bought CHUM and were forced to sell Citytv. So excuse me if I find it farfeched that the CRTC will allow Corus to launch another kids network, when they already own four!

It get worse. If they can't get away with owning five kids networks, they might just have to incorporate Disney Channel's crap onto YTV's lineup. That's a fall from grace if I ever saw one: YTV goes from weird shows, anime & teen dramas, to low-budget kid-coms and Disney Channel crap. At least Teletoon would get the mercy of only airing Disney's cartoons; they already air Marvel Universe, and I wouldn't mind them throwing Star Wars Rebels into the mix.

But I just don't see myself getting behind this. The last thing Canadian networks need is another monopoly, especially when the pick-and-pay revolution is right around the corner.

Saturday, 11 April 2015

The Problem With Youth Networks

I've been wanting to get this off my chest. Forget YTV for a second, let's talk about MTV2 Canada again, because, quite frankly, you know how I feel about that channel. Whatever YTV has done to deserve it's heat (ie alienated older audiences, produced crappy Spongebob-knockoffs, etc), MTV2 deserves just as much.

Razer had everything that I could ever want in a speciality service, it had diverse programming: comedies, teen dramas, anime, music shows, extreme sports, and some really good movies. They carried over most of that stuff to its rebrand as MTV2, but then slowly devolved into the crappy waste of space that they are now. I guess it's because MTV2 targets a more older demographic than Razer did, but I'd rather not give those scumbags at Bell Media any sort of sympathy; that belongs to G4.

You got to understand, shows about technology and gaming are every bit a money pit as shows related to music. It's not like you just create a channel that shows nothing but game trailers and expect people to watch; music videos, maybe. That's why G4 did what it did, and that's why G4techTV, to distinguish it from the American version, also did what it did, but better. By incorporating X-Play and Attack of the Show with the shows produced by The Electric Playground, G4techTV was able to build an audience of teens and young adults and capitalize on it without violating their licence.

They had adult animated series, anime, and comedies, all of which were related to technology or gaming. If it sounds too good to be true, that's because it was. You see, the problem with G4techTV was that it was way too faithful to it's American counterpart. They got rid of Anime Current and replaced with ADd, then threw in a bunch of shit that also didn't have anything to do with technology. It's got so bad that the CRTC had to intervene; what you see on G4 nowadays is the aftermath, and it ain't pretty.

I don't need to say anything about YTV that anyone my age hasn't already said. Teletoon is better, it just is. Sure, with The Haunting Hour, My Babysitter's a Vampire, and now the original drama, Open Heart (from the makers of Degrassi), they're in a slightly better place then they were before. But even if they bring back Bionix, which they REALLY need to do, it won't change the fact that the only good shows on YTV come from Nickelodeon. You might as well watch the Canadian version of Nick, hell, you might as well watch BBC Kids: now that's a network I'd let my kids watch.

At this point, it seems MTV would be a better network to watch, which I find very depressing. Is it any wonder why no one watches TV anymore? This shit ain't worth it, not when I can watch better stuff on Netflix.

Monday, 6 April 2015

Another Pointless MuchMusic Rant...

I have no problem with MuchMusic's current direction. Compared to the crap the American networks did, I find it a nice change of pace. I certainly didn't complain when they got rid of The Vampire Diaries and Pretty Little Liars and I complained less when they aired The Cleveland Show instead. I like what they're doing; what I don't like is why. Ratings.

Let's talk original programs. For the record, The Wedge was hands down the best show on Much; Video on Trial hasn't been good since CHUM was bought out. Also, if I want to watch an awards show that panders to tweens, I'd watch the Teen Choice Awards, not the MMVAs. It doesn't matter now anyways. Thanks to cutbacks, Much will never produce another show again. You know you've hit rock bottom when you can't even afford to produce one of the cheapest shows ever made.

Much would much rather air Comedy Central's shows then produce their own. The problem with that is, it just makes you want to watch Comedy Central instead. With the exception of Tosh.0, @midnight, and maybe South Park, all those shows should be on The Comedy Network. I don't like all three of these shows but, given this is a "pop culture" network we're talking about, at least THAT makes sense.

Look, Much, you already got The Tonight Show, Conan, The Simpsons, Community, and The Fresh Prince of Bel Air in regular airings. All you needed to do was make better use of them. You didn't need to air Jimmy Kimmel Live reruns, TBS sitcoms, or no-name game shows to get more viewers. If you REALLY need something for late night, or some extra ratings in non-peak hours, why don't you "play some more damn videos?!"

...How is it that TSN isn't this bad?

10 Things You Should Know About

1. I know it sounds strange for someone who enjoys watching Spartacus: Blood and Sand to worry about what's on Teletoon. After all, it's no Cartoon Network. But, between Nerd Corps new series, Endangered Species, and the new version of Inspector Gadget, I'd say these are Teletoon's best shows in a LONG time.

2. Vice and Bloomberg are launching new networks later this year. More importantly, G98.7 FM (CKFG) is launching a new television network later this year.

3. MuchMusic is launching a new multi-channel network on YouTube. Great, another reason to hate MuchMusic AND YouTube.

4. Pick-and-Pay will be a thing. Yay!

5. Fuse is rebranding as a pop culture/entertainment/lifestyle network. Been there, Done that, Fuck that.

6. Toonami has launched a new channel in India. Yet, the main block on Adult Swim is getting shorter. I know I shouldn't worry but, one word: Bionix.

7. Hulu is now available in Canada ...and April Fool's was five days ago.

8. Showcase got a makeover to celebrate their 20th Anniversary. They also replaced the old voice announcer with the guy from MysteryTV.

9. G4 Canada was launched in HD. In other news, people still watch G4.

10. I got nothing

Friday, 3 April 2015

Have I Mentioned That Canadian Networks Suck?

...If I hadn't, then I was too busy slamming Bell Media. They truly are the catalyst for everything wrong with Canadian television today. From the moment they bought out CHUM, everything went down the shitter, and when they destroyed Astral Media, everything went to hell. Of course, the reasons why Canadian networks suck are more of a joint effort. Let's back up a bit, shall we?

In the beginning, it wasn't a monopoly, there were a plethora of companies with their own speciality services. YTV pitted their Nickelodeon-inspired weirdness against the predominately unreal Teletoon. MTV was launched in Canada to steal MuchMusic's thunder. TSN and Sportsnet traded blows, and owners, even when they shared the same building. Then, the fun really started when The Score came on to the scene, with WWE programming in tow.

Canadian programming was in the spotlight. Whether it was the indie films on Showcase, the innovative series on The Comedy Network, or the unique animated shows that graced Teletoon from dawn till dusk. It wasn't just about American imports, it was also about international programming. Going back to Teletoon, some of their best shows were made by/with studios from around the world. Going back to YTV, if you weren't into 15/Love, you were too busy watching Naruto.

Fast forward to today. With all the money broadcast networks gained in simulcasting American dramas, you'd think they spend some on developing new Canadian shows. Instead, they spend it on more American shows, and I mean American shows. Though, in recent years, it would seem as though Rogers and Shaw have tried to reverse this trend. But I can tell you this much, locking away your content on a cable-exclusive steaming service won't help anyone.

Exclusivity deals turned speciality channels into cheap knock-offs of American brands; literally, in the case of the current MTV Canada. YTV canned many of their interesting shows and alienated older audiences to become an even crappier version of Nickelodeon, in spite of a local version already on the air. Cartoon Network has recovered from an infamous period of network decay, and has actually helped elevate the animation genre in the process; Teletoon continues to produce cheap fodder for kinderg√§rtners and man-children.

This is because Corus owns both networks and they mainly produce programs for women & children, leaving more mature programming to other broadcasters. On the other hand, Nickelodeon and Cartoon Network are owned by separate companies, with separate goals, and separate budgets. You see the problem here? If Teletoon was owned by someone other than Corus, they wouldn't follow in YTV's footsteps, they would try something different.

Nowadays, and I just realized this now, it's not a competition any more; it's a turf war; with everyone and everything caught in the crossfire. Since all of Canadian television boils down to just three companies, and they all own about twenty television services; they don't have the money to produce their own shit, so they just buy more shows from the U.S. Canadian shows take a back seat to American shows, to the point were, in the case of YTV, they become so low quality, the American shows are the only ones worth watching.

Hence, the popularity of the internet, streaming services, and the trend of cord-cutting. Because why complain about YTV not airing anime, when I can watch that shit anytime, anywhere? Why complain about Much's ignorance towards music, when I can fire up VevoTV? Why bother watching crappy Canadian networks, when online services are providing a platform for shows by people who don't want to play it safe? That's all the motivation I need.

In a decade or two, the broadcasters will realize they can't have their cake and eat it too, the CRTC will realize how broken telecommunications have become and, with a little help from consumers, things will get better. Until then, here's to the new Daredevil series on Netflix.